Monday, January 31, 2011

Response Post 1, Week 3

In response to Candis' Calisthenics, Week 3

The poem that came from the random lines from random sources was packed with loads of images. There is the image of male menopause, which I laughed at. The image of a murdered girl. Also the image of someone smelling the dawn drafts. The arrangement of the lines that made up the poem was interesting, but I would like to see som of the lines moved around more. There is no doubt that there is enough material for this to be a very interesting piece of work. I would like to suggest that the second line become the first line and the fourth line become the third line. I think with a few revisions and playing around with the lines that this could really blossom into an awesome piece. 

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